“Self-confidence” and “confidence” are often used interchangeably. I’d actually argue that the former is an oxymoron. The modified term is misleading, implying that confidence springs from within and may reflect unintentional cultural bias. I’ve learned the hard way that I am more confident, i.e. certain of achieving a particular outcome when I am aligned with my client needs. First, because helping others gives me energy … Read More 2018 resolution: Separate “self” from confidence
Recently while volunteering as a mock interviewer I was working with a young woman applying for legal librarian roles. She was qualified but some of her responses indicated a lack of confidence and fear about the perceived value of her role. Speaking about industry trends, she brought up how librarian services were often “the first to go” when cutbacks were being made. That may, … Read More 2 ways to think about the value you bring
Google returns 131 M results in 1.2 seconds for “reasons to get out of bed.” Most mornings I wake up before my alarm, which is set for 05:35 and my first thought is “I don’t want to miss the best part of the day.” To me that time between 6:00 and 9:00 is when I get my best writing done. It is the center … Read More What gets you out of bed?
I’ve struggled writing anything after this year’s election on these pages (not on facebook where I have been astounded by the insensitivity of “friends.”) First let me say, I don’t dislike conservatives, in fact, I have a lot in common with them. However, I think it’s clear from this website that I believe in radical generosity, community, and empathy. I am now what many … Read More The morning after …
I’ve screwed up my fair share of interviews, not because I didn’t know enough or wasn’t qualified, but because I didn’t know the “secret handshake.” A friend who got a job at Colgate right after b-school told me, before her interview, an alumna told her to go to CVS and the A&P and study all the SKUs in the toothpaste category. That little piece … Read More Learn the Secret Handshake
John Noonan has worked with the likes of Mitt Romney and Jeb Bush and represents much of the old paradigm that I find frustrating, callous, and unsustainable. I did not expect to appreciate what he had to say. I think he must have guessed he had a tough audience because he tread lightly as he walked onto the stage, aware – I think – that … Read More Get woke – 3 brilliant suggestions from across the aisle.
“I would like to think she would find another career or find another company if that was the case,” Trump in response to what his daughter should do if she was sexually harassed. Politics aside that might actually be the smartest thing Trump has ever said. OBVIOUSLY many women (and people), can’t afford to simply quit their job when their employer acts like a bag … Read More Trump got something (sorta) right
Always remember, others may hate you, but those who hate you don’t win unless you hate them, and then you destroy yourself. Bob Woodward ended his TED talk with this chilling quote from Nixon. I’m not sure Stephen King could have written a better line. It’s at once poetic, tragic and human; a message and warning to those that come after. To grow we accept, … Read More The Poetry… & Trajedy of Nixon #TEDxMidAtlantic
It’s hard to explain why we coach, it’s like trying to explain why we live at all. It’s that fundamental. Coaching is how we become infinite, how we love and give love. Once you learn how to fly you can’t help but want to share that knowledge. That is why we give back. There is no other reason beyond that simple truth. If you … Read More Mantra for 10.24.16 – Coaching
TEDx MidAtlantic was great. The event took place in Washington, DC – literally around the corner from where my writing group meets on Monday, which was oddly comforting. At the after party I was chatting with David Troy one of the co-organizers. He said after organizing several of these events, he believes, the value of a TED event is not just the ideas … Read More TEDx MidAtlantic: Intentional Brain Demolition
If there is one thing consultants like —as much as three bullet points, assessments, and roadmaps—it’s windowpane charts. Amanda explains in chapter 2 of the Art of Asking – that the difference between asking and begging is mutual respect. I’ve taken that idea and translated it into an understanding of “worthiness” which I plotted on the X-axis. Then I started thinking about entitlement, … Read More The 4 kinds of asking
Amanda’s Ted Talk back in 2013 “bulldozed a road down the center of my mind.” It resonated with one of those amazing “yeses” that occur when you come across a piece of profound truth. Her book expounds more fully on the art of asking, part memoir, part musical interlude, it’s a study in intimacy, vulnerability, artistry, connection and what it’s like to date Neil … Read More The Underrated Art of Asking